I did warn you i probably wouldnt be a good blogger.

So i think i can say pretty confidently that i am not a good blogger. I always feel like i need to have something witty or important to say. and mostly.... my life is pretty boring. so here are a few things, as boring as they may be, that are going on around here.

First of all, i watch too much hgtv. it makes me want to change things around here constantly. I'm always looking for my next project, or deciding what color i want to paint something. next up? the guest bedroom is getting a makeover, and my family room is going to get a repaint.

I love fall. wait, let me say that again. I LOVE FALL!!! just the smell of it makes me happy. (and, yes, it does have a smell) watching the leaves change is something i need. i feel for my loved ones in Phoenix. i was there once in October, and it made me sad. i feel so much appreciation for Heavenly Father when i watch the seasons change. It is so beautiful here right now.

Along with fall comes my favorite holiday.... Halloween. i am absolutely obsessed with the paranormal. ghosts, vampires, werewolves, zombies, and all that comes with them. (see my husbands recent blog entry...) i know there are things that cant be explained, i have experienced it. if i wasn't so afraid of the dark, i would totally be a paranormal investigator. James and i have spent the last 6 weeks or so making tombstones for a Halloween graveyard. it has been so much fun, and if i do say so myself, we are pretty good at it. my hope is that someone wealthy will see it and offer us a ton of money just to make fake tombstones. not too much to ask right??

The kids in my life are hilarious. i love talking to them. i don't ever remember being as smart as they are.
Today Gracie was telling me about carving pumpkins with her dad. she said that he was eating the guts from the pumpkin and trying to get her to try them. i said, "eww that is gross" and she said "i KNOW i told him, "dad that is NOT healthy"". she is 3 and a half going on 20.
There is a man nearby with a large farm. he plants various veggies for my family, so we all spend time there picking various things. last week it was potatoes. the smell at the farm is well.... terrible. actually terrible is an understatement. its really really really terrible... so we are picking up potatoes and Saydee says to me, "this is just like finding Easter eggs at Easter". i respond, "i don't know about that, it certainly doesn't SMELL like Easter". and without missing a beat she says, "you don't know Wendi, it could have smelled just like this when Jesus was resurrected". touche Saydee, touche.

My Wayner is getting married. there are people in my life who i have a physical need to take care of. Wayne was about 12 when i met him, and that need kicked in quickly. He is like the son i haven't been given. and i am so excited that he has found someone who makes him so happy. Linda is an amazing woman, and i know that they are going to be so great together. i am grateful that they have been so willing to let me take part in helping them plan. i love them so much, and i am so thankful they are such a part of my life.

My husband is the greatest gift i have ever been given. there is no one in my life that brings me more happiness, or shows me more love. he is the one who knows ALL my secrets, and yet he still wants to hang out with me.... i know right? we are completely connected, and i really do feel like he is my "other half". i know his face more than i know my own. just hearing his voice makes me happy, and he is constantly making me laugh. i grow more thankful for him everyday.

I am preparing for my life to have some things change over the next year. some big changes, others small. i haven't ever been very good with change, and ill admit that I'm scared. but I'm also optimistic, and excited.

I am grateful for a husband that loves me. for family that is supportive and there for me. for friends who don't care that I'm a little bit crazy. but mostly for my testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel. i don't know what people who don't have prayer and faith do when things get difficult. who do they talk to when their heart hurts or they feel afraid? how do they find peace in a world where there just isn't any? the peace, comfort, love, and joy i receive from my faith is something that i wish everyone i love had.

There are many things in my life i wish i was better at, and blogging is just another on that list. I guess i'll just have to start writing about stuff, even if it is boring. sorry in advance for anyone that reads it....

When did this happen?

I have a friend who among mutual friends is known as the "recipe Nazi" she is an amazing cook, and makes all these fantastic treats and absolutely refuses to share her recipes with anyone. I used to laugh and think that was totally crazy... used to.

My ward is putting together a cookbook and the relief society pres asked me if i would submit some of my recipes. For a second, just a second, i wanted to say "NO!" but of course i didn't, and the other day i set about entering my recipes into the online book.

I found myself actually being picky about the recipes i was going to share, how ridiculous is that? I would enter one recipe, and skip about 4 before i entered another one. So answer me this, when in my life did i become a recipe Nazi????


I went to the doctor the other day and left with like a MILLION prescriptions.... granted some of them were for my husband, but tell me this, when did i become the old lady with the full pill box????


When i was in my twenties, i drove like a bat out of hell. Last night, i had to go and pick up James from work. It was about 9:00 and dark outside, and i nearly had a panic attack getting there.

I cant see in the dark anymore for some reason, and spent the whole drive complaining to myself about the traffic and the stupid road construction. At what point in my life did driving become an absolutely painful experience????


A few months ago we went to a birthday party at a friends house. As we were leaving they were saying how they don't get to see us often enough. As we walked to the car, one of them shouted after us. "come and visit us again soon, even though i know you are busy with all your OTHER friends!"

i laughed, then i said to James, "I wonder if they really do think we have abandoned them for other people...." because the sad truth is the only "other friends" James and i have are... well James and i. we used to have lots of friends that we hung out with. parties we would throw or go to. but for probably the last 2 years or so, the only person i find myself wanting to hang out with is James. and leaving the house? pft, why would we. when did i become agoraphobic????


I turned 35 on my last birthday. that was tough. I'm not sure why, it didn't bother me when i turned 30, but for some reason 35 was a lot harder. I am changing, and not for the better in a lot of ways. But at the same time, i have a sense of peace and comfort that i never had in my twenties. I'm grateful for all the good things in my life, and the good things about me. hopefully they out weigh all this craziness.

the secret transcript....

A secret transcript of a Udot meeting: (Udot is the people who do road construction in Utah, for those that don't know.):


Bob: (not his real name, but for my story it is.) So everybody, I have had a brilliant idea of a great joke we could play. My plan is this: we are going to have ALL the freeway on and off ramps under construction in northern Utah county at the same time.

Other Guy: Um, Bob, did you say ALL of them?

Bob: Yes, other guy, i did.

Other Guy: are you sure that's a good idea?

Other Other guy: yeah, Bob I'm not even sure we have enough orange barrels for that.

Bob: But don't we have some of those cement walls of death things?

Other other guy: well, yeah we do have some of those, even though I'm not sure that is their technical name.

Bob: well then, PUT EM UP!

Other guy: I see another problem Bob, I'm not sure we have enough employees to be working on all these projects at the same time.

Bob: who said anything about working on them!? Just move crap around, put up the barrels and the walls of death and let the fun begin!

Other other guy: Bob this sounds like it might be really inconvenient for people that live and drive in that area.

Bob: don't be such a stick in the mud Other Other Guy, its going to be HILARIOUS!

TWO MONTHS LATER:

Other Guy: Okay Bob, we've got everything under construction as you wanted, its chaos, annoying, causes terrible traffic at any time of day, and looks like crap.

Bob: Perfect.


I wasn't at this meeting, its just how it HAD to have gone, trust me.

Fourth of July fun!

i have been thinking all day about how to blog about the fourth of july weekend. Frankly i dont know where to start, or what to include. Will it get boring if i go over every hilarious moment? Or will it be sad when i talk about how quiet things are around here.

There are some days that just take over parts of your memory, just to be sure they dont get lost. I had more then one of those days that weekend. On friday, Dave, Emmy, the kids, Kathy, James and i went to Lagoon. Im pretty sure i cant remember the last time i have laughed that much, or that hard. It was the most fun day i have had in..... well a really long time.

Before we went i stated that i probably wasnt going to ride much if anything, and then we got there. I made kathy ride all kinds of things with me, mostly because we are hilarious when we are apart, and when we are together its HILARIOUS with all caps.

We were laughing for absolutely no reason, other then to laugh. I kept saying, "why is this so funny??" and Kathy kept saying, "why did you make me come on this ride? this was a TERRIBLE idea" and that just made it funnier.

By the end of the day, we had conquered the tidal wave twice, gone blind from spinning on the tilt a whirl, broken her knee on the jet star, followed a terrified alexis on the terror ride, destroyed ourselves on the colossus, and scared ourselves a bit on dracula's castle. (which was sans dracula by the way....that was kinda weird)

And in between all the hilariousness we all enjoyed watching the kids riding everything they were tall enough to ride, and loving every minute of it.

the girls went shopping on saturday, it was so fun. And then that night we had a bbq with my family, and a bunch of fireworks. Alexis and Timothy both fell asleep during the fireworks and when Kathy tried to pick Alexis up at the end she muttered something like "nooo im not done yet" it was so funny.

It was so great to spend time with everyone, we had so much fun! We hope everyone will come and visit again soon, so that things will be busy and noisy again, it makes me happy.

vampires are just plain cool.

I am not a girly girl. Never have been. But sometimes i have experiences that remind me clearly of this fact.
I spent the afternoon with some of the girls in my family seeing Eclipse. Let me preface this by saying, i loved the books. I thought they were fun, and different, and incredibly entertaining. I also unsurprisingly loved the movies. Do i find Edward's hair incredibly over quaffed? Yes. Is Bella's incessant moping annoying? Yes. Is Jacob incredibly whiny, and a not so good actor? DEFINITELY yes. But i still enjoy a fun story as much as the next person.
Except......
I loved the movie, i really did. But the swooning, and the giggling, and the whispering by the audience every time someone kissed or took their shirt off made it incredibly difficult for me to not roll my eyes. In fact I'll admit it. I did roll my eyes quite a number of times. But when the long awaited (for me anyway) fight scene took place, i believe i may have been the only person in the room, who when jasper LITERALLY punched someones head off, said out loud "that was AWESOME".
My sisters think I'm quite crazy.
Its not that I'm not a romantic. I am, in a sense. But give me a Colonel Brandon, a Mr. Darcy, or a Captain Wentworth. An Edward Ferrars, a Mr. Knightly, or a Mr. Rochester, any day over a Jacob OR an Edward.
To quote a favorite television character of mine. "you have to admit, vampires are just plain cool." and to throw in my two cents, werewolves aren't bad either.
But for me, well, id rather just see them being werewolves and vampires. Sure throw in a little love story, it always makes for better story telling, but in the end it was the head punching, werewolf tackling, arm ripping off, bouncing off the trees, fight that i found the most entertaining.
That probably says something about me, but hopefully nothing that makes you love me any less. ;)

Jesus!? I know him!

Today Draven, Gracie, Gabree and I made some pictures to send to Drew in Hawaii. Its very interesting to get a child's view of a mission when they have never experienced one before.
I said, "i think we should make some pictures to send to Drew in Hawaii, i bet he would really love that", to which Draven responded, "is Drew going to be in Hawaii forever?"
hmm interesting question, the words "two years" means very little to a 6 year old.
So i said, "well not forever exactly. but a long time, he will back when you are 8". When i said it out loud, i almost wanted to say, WOW, that IS forever....
Gracie wanted to paint her picture, so i got out the paint and she said "what should i paint?"
I suggested maybe some trees or flowers, and then i said, "you should put a missionary on it too"
"What's a missionary?"
"Well, a missionary is a person who goes somewhere far away to teach people about Jesus."
To which she responded (and this was my favorite part by the way) "JESUS?!! I KNOW HIM!" and she said it pretty much like that scene in elf when Buddy is told Santa is coming to town. AWESOME.
Draven decided to draw A: a picture of batman on one side, and B: a picture of Bruce Banner turning into the Hulk on the other side.
And Gabree got more purple crayon on my kitchen counter then on the paper.
So we made our pictures, and it was fun. I cant mail it out yet though, because James has insisted the he is going to color a picture of a panda bear to send, (yeah i don't know either)
I might make it a weekly occurrence, or at least until Drew writes me asking me to stop sending him crayon and paint covered printer paper.
Aloha Elder Carter, we love you!

Meltdown.

So every once in a while i have a meltdown.
I don't know if this is something that happens to everyone or not. But at some point after a few weeks of putting things on a shelf, the shelf collapses and i have a complete meltdown.
it usually consists of a lot of crying, a moderate amount of self loathing, and ends with complete exhaustion.
It can be anything that sets it off. Usually something small that finally breaks the proverbial camel, and the rest of the world comes crumbling with it.
The reason i am bringing this up, is because yesterday i had a doozy. It started with small things, and as the weekend went on it got bigger until i found myself crying uncontrollably. I was angry at myself for some stupid mistakes, angry at some other people for THEIR mistakes, and missing Sheri big time.
Does everyone have these days??? Maybe i don't want to know the answer to that one....
So when it all came falling down, like the London bridge kids sing about, at about midnight last night, i wanted to curl up in a ball and give up.
But i didn't.
And i never do.
And here is the reason.
James. He is my knight in armor, my hero, my conscience, and my voice of reason. He is the one person in my life who can say to me in a calm and rational voice, "Wendi, STOP IT." and i do. Granted sometimes it takes me ten minutes or so, and sometimes the feelings remain. But all of a sudden life feels like it can and will continue.
I have an amazing life. One that makes me ashamed i even have these episodes of complete craziness. I think i need to hang a sign somewhere in my house that i will see everyday. It will say, "today people are going to say rude things to me, or hurt me by not saying something i think they should. There are going to be people in my life today that are going to bring back painful memories, no matter how deep i think i have buried them. Today i am going to forget something important, do something stupid, and miss some one i love who isn't here anymore. But I AM GOING TO DEAL."
You would think by the age of 35 i would have learned to let the Lord take over when i feel like i cant handle things anymore. But I'm still learning.
I would like nothing more than to say that I'm going to do that from now on. No more anger at people who have hurt my husband or family. No more hating myself for not doing things as perfectly as i think i should have, or making the silly mistakes i make everyday.
I would REALLY like to say that....
I love the people in my life, you all make a difference to me in one way or another. I'm grateful for an amazing husband who tries to get me, and when he doesn't, he still keeps trying. I'm grateful for an amazing family, who don't try and manipulate me, and love me for who i am. I'm thankful for a Heavenly Father that loves me. And mostly, I'm thankful for a Savior who doesn't care if i manage to complete all my housework perfectly, that i am constantly forgetting appointments, and that my Jello is a totally weird color.